To the boy I've ghosted

Hey, remember when it was 2009 

and we talked over myspace till late night

over some stupid memes? 

And your obsession on TS?

And in 2010, we talked for the whole year,

you called me to tell about the event that I couldn't go to?

And you surprised me with a visit?

And I didn't text you about my PMR results because I didn't want you to be sad?

It was me who didn't reply your text and you thought our friendship was over?

And in 2011, we didn't talk at all?

But little did I know, you still cared?

And you read each of my blogposts but

we still pretended like we're no longer friends.

Our eyes met but we acted like strangers with history?

And the next thing I knew, you're already in

a relationship.

Couldn't lie, but it hurt at that time.

But I thought, oh it's my fault because I ghosted you.

It was 2012, I texted you,

telling you I was sorry. 

You told me, I never hurt you.

You said, you hope you didn't hurt me too.

But I couldn't say the reason

because at that point I didn't think it was anyone's fault.

But I wanted to say it anyway, for my personal closure.

^ the lines I wrote back in 2014.

Only kept this post in my draft.

Today, I'm posting this.

For the reason that I realized,

a lot of things have changed since then.

Maybe I did have feelings for him back then, 

but we both never talked about it.

Not even close to talk about personal feelings.

It's always about something random.

Maybe it's just at that time, I thought we had many things in common.

And maybe he would have feelings for me too, because of 2010.

But I ended up not continue talking,

I couldn't figure out why.

I think we did talk about it after,

he thought I was busy, so he avoided initiating any conversation too.

Maybe it wasn't technically ghosting.

It's just both of us just stopped talking to each other.

Fast forward, 10 years later..

I realized, it's for the best.

I'm glad it didn't hurt me as much that time, 

because it was just a high school crush,

and things didn't get too personal.

For all those reasons,

I'm still glad this all happened.

We're no longer friends,

but it's okay.

And I don't know how to end this post.

Maybe I should just leave this hanging?