Finally, Pan's mom put the ring on me (literally :P)!

Engagement Day, 28 December 2019

Pan and I had never planned to get engaged. We planned to get married right away, and wanted to do a small merisik (pre-engagement involving two families only). But my parents insisted on engagement ceremony – because that’s a tradition of Melaka people and because I’m the first daughter and granddaughter.

So, my parents set the engagement date to be on Dec 28, 2019 and this date has been set like 5 months ago. Pan and I started to think of what to give each other for the hatarans (gifts) and we decided on 5-7 of dulangs – I’ll give him 7 gifts and he’ll give me 5. Women need to give more gifts because men’s gifts are known to be more expensive. Do you wanna know what were our hantarans? Keep reading.

Over the 5 months of planning, I didn’t plan for the event to be big. It should be like less than 50 family members from both sides, the hantarans, food and that’s all. It got escalated to be a three-tent ceremony, with 300 invitees, food caterers, multiple types of desserts, dress, mini dais, hand bouquet, photographer, makeup artist like omg. And there were so many surprises along the way too, bad and good.

November 22, 2019

My family, who stays in Turkmenistan flew back to Malaysia on a short notice because my nenek (maternal grandmother) was hospitalized and her condition was 50-50. I had meeting in Melaka that day, but someone needed to pick up my family from the airport. Pan was not working that day, so he drove to Melaka with his sister, took my dad’s car and picked me up from TNB Jasin and we made our way to KLIA.

My family arrived at 1030pm. On that day, I was just feeling so blue, I was worried about my nenek and at the same time, preparing for the worse and praying to God, may Allah give my family one last chance to meet my nenek. Alhamdulillah, that prayer was granted. My dad speeded to Ampang Hospital, we all begged to see nenek and my mom decided to stay back at the hospital to take care of her. I had to go back to Subang because I had to be on standby tomorrow.

November 23, 2019 – 430am

I heard phone ringing. It’s my mom calling my dad. My dad woke us up – breaking the news, my nenek has passed away. It’s not a surprise, because of her condition. In a way, I am thankful that she didn’t have to suffer now, she’s been sick for a long time. Sad, indeed but it’s written. We made our way to the hospital and I am grateful that I got to recite yaasin for her, shower her for the last time and witness everything till the moment she’s buried. It’s definitely an experience that I will always remember. It’s sad to know that I have lost 3 out of 4 grandparents, but when I think about it again, Allah has lent them to me for the past 20-ish years, all the memories with them I shall cherish forever.

November 24, 2019 - YEDP

I couldn’t mourn for long, life has to go on. I had to attend YEDP (Young Executive Development Program) – going to the program, I knew a very few people. But I managed to make some friends, I am happy for that.

Basically starting this date, all the engagement preparation was taken over by my parents.

December 14, 2019

Two weeks before the engagement day, Pan’s family came to my home to meet my parents for further discussion and stuff. I didn’t get to be there the whole time because they were discussing it at the dining room but there’s no enough chair so I had to stay at the kitchen sobs. But the outcome was positive, our families could get along and honestly, that day gave me more butterflies than the real engagement day.

December 24, 2019

Four days before engagement day, my dad surprised me with an engagement gift! It’s a freaking CAR! Okay when I say gift, it means he settled all the deposits and the process of getting the car, and on that Christmas Eve, he drove the whole family to Toyota Melaka and I saw a white car with red ribbon and the registration number was XXX 8872 – I knew it must be my car! Elaine, the sales lady, who has been helping out my family with buying Toyota car since ever, showed me my new car and all its specs. I’m impressed with my parents’ taste, sometimes I don’t know how can I keep up with that. I am so touched. Later, Elaine introduced me to the bank officer, to sign my loan. Oh yes, I am not that kid, whom parents would pay for everything lol. Monthly payment, will still be deducted from my bank account #ripmoney. All in all, I was still surprised because all this while, I thought my first car would be myvi, I had always wanted a myvi to be my first car, couldn’t believe it got upgraded to be Toyota Yaris. Blessed to have my parents. How could I repay their love and sacrifice :'(

my excited face before knowing i had to pay for the car monthly lol

December 25, 2019

I hadn’t been driving for three months and yet I needed to drive Yaris because it’s my car, lol. So, Pan was on leave that day (because it’s Christmas day), so he drove back from Johor to PD, made a pit-stop at Melaka to teach me how to drive back. I drove, he’s by my side, we made our way to the place where I custom-made my engagement dress – at @lumiereconcept boutique, a few minute drive from Mahkota Parade. I had my final fitting and tbh I was so impressed with how my dress looked like, I didn’t expect it to be that exclusive. They knew that I love @theduckgroup, so they re-created duckscarf chiffon lace so it will match the lace on my dress and added Swarovski to it, like omg. Pan was surprised too and thank god this is not a wedding dress lol, so he could see it before the big day.

We went back home before 2pm because our wedding planner, @og_crafx wanted to meet my parents officially before they left for Turkmenistan. The meeting lasted for 3 hours and Pan was stuck at my place till the end. The next day, @og_crafx came again to set up the event place.

We hired @og_crafx to do my hantaran for Pan, and requested for mini dais and tents as well but Kak Og and Abang Izam were generous and kind enough to transform the whole event looking like a wedding. We requested for 2 tents, but a day before the event, my dad requested for one more. Thank God for that bold decision, we didn’t have enough place for every guest!

December 27, 2019

There was a stranger's car parked at our garden, my mom asked me to move my car and check who's that person. As I about to drive the car, from the side mirror, I saw my younger sister who shouldn’t be back, because it’s such a short holiday and to fly all the way from where she is now could take her 24 hours to reach Malaysia! And everyone told me that she wouldn’t fly back, so it caught me by surprise! Indeed, this whole week was full of surprises!

Back to the main story.

I ordered brownies from @72cakes – founded by Haseira, a friend of mine and because she had to deliver the brownies to Melaka from Cheras, I hired her to be my MUA too. As for my photographer -my best friend, Mimi couldn’t come to the event because she had to work in Auckland, so she managed to convince his boyfriend, Ajijui to be my photographer. Fuhh.

For the doorgift, we ordered cookies in jar by @themoonsgallery and we also gave a piece of Turkmenistan-made handkerchief – everything was placed inside a paperbag.

For hantarans, I gave him

1. Fresh sirih junjung

2. Macarons

3. Cake

4. Garrets popcorn

5. Pulut kuning and rendang

6. Baju melayu

7. Buah

Kak og helped me out even with the sirih junjung, I am so extra that I requested for orchids on sirih junjung. I also got super busy so I asked for kak og’s help to find buah as well.

I ordered macarons and cake from @byemanajwa and they are all the way from Perlis! Haseira did me a favor and picked the cake up from Kajang for me.

As for what Pan gave me, we discussed the lists and for my hantarans, the whole family helped out with the deco.

He gave me

1. Sirih junjung

2. Sweets

3. A box of duck

4. Ferrero Rocher tower

5. Two rings - merisik and tunang.

i love each one of the hantarans <3

decorated by my Uda

All hantarans were overshadowed by the tower. When I asked for Ferrero Rocher tower, I expected a small mini cute tower, but Pan, a guy full of unexpected surprises, made a tower made of 210 Ferrero Rocher!!! So all eyes on the chocolates, not even the rings!

On the day of the engagement, it was one of the most hectic days of my life. Three days before the event, I experienced major breakouts! On my forehead and it’s all bumpy! I never had acnes on foreheads before so I got extra worried! Usually it’s just the scarring but now the acnes were textured! There’s no way concealer could cover that 😭

On that day, I did all the masking, prepping my skin well for the makeup and yettttt my makeup got all cakey and flaky! I was this 👌🏼 close to breaking down, but I had to stay cool, so I requested for the makeup to be removed and redid the makeup again!!

It was 1:35pm and Pan’s family would arrive at 3:00pm!! And I didn’t even start with the shawl!

literally 5 mins before I needed to walk out of the room

But Alhamdulillah with the help of my MUA and my cousin, I could walk out of my room for the ring ceremony looking decent. My hands were freezing; I was so nervous but I guess the ceremony went smooth. I didn’t know what happened before I was called out, but Pan was introduced to the guests after his mom put on the engagement and merisik rings on me.

the ring ceremony

It’s so funny because after his dad introduced him, he had to shake hands with the guests and made his way up till the dais, and he pretended like he wanted to sit next to me hahaha so everyone laughed! Because technically, he couldn’t do that yet :P

Pan's face after the gimmick he made - like he did nothing at all :P

The photo sessions took longer than I expected, there’re too many people wanting to take pictures with me – even I couldn’t take pictures with my family until all the guests left. I didn’t eat proper food and honestly, it’s an exhausting day but I feel so content and happy. Ajijui Mimi stayed till the end, such a dedicated photographer!

I got to meet my family and friends, everyone is happy because the food is great! I am happy with the amount of people who came, pretty event setup, hantarans, dais, tents and my dress! Most importantly, all family members reunited to make sure the ceremony went smoothly. Alhamdulillah.

After changing the status, from Pan’s girlfriend to Pan’s fiancée, it feels weird haha! Looking back, I never thought I would be engaged at this age. My 17-year-old wouldn’t expect myself to be engaged to Pan hahaha! I mean, because of whatever upside down issues we had to go through. Alhamdulillah for everything.

Sharing some more photos with you - for the memories hehe <3