I used to be the girl who wanted gifts and
birthday parties when it came to my birthday.
I couldnt deny it. My last birthday celebration with my friends and
with proper cake was when i was in high school.
The prank was real! Next, with my family,
it was two years ago, when the whole big families of mine came
to kmb with cake and laksa!
Last year's birthday celebration was a belated one, with Haqqim
and it was a successful surprise from him.
This year, I dont feel like celebrating my birthday.
I just realised that I havent celebrated my birthday with my dad
for a very long time,
because he's always away for his work.
I miss all of the celebrations at home,
I stop celebrating my birthday at home since
I was 13, because of boarding school.
And I still remember my 13th birthday fell
on the date when my dad had to continue his work in the UK.
I couldn't contact my dad because it was during
orientation week and the form 1 students were not
allowed to use the public phones at all.
It was really heart-breaking.
But this's one of many things that I will definitely
share with my kids;
You will not always get to celebrate your birthday
with your loved ones, every year.
So, when you do, appreciate it.
Due to the weird feeling
that I have; not to celebrate my birthday this year,
I did hide my birth date on Facebook.
Simply because,
I believe people only wish you Happy Birthday
because there's this one thing called Facebook Birthday Reminder.
When I did this,
only those who really remember
my birthday, will wish me.
That's more thoughtful :)
This year,
I am blessed to be studying abroad.
I also get to celebrate my birthday for two days.
Because Malaysia time is 13 hours ahead of Canada.
And having friends from all over the world,
NZ, Australia.
The feeling is very unique, indescribable.
The one and only person who wished me
twice was Qim~
The first second of 12th January of Malaysia time
and the first second of 12th January of Canada time.
Yeay, I am a happy girl.
I spent hours on facetime with my mum yesterday
and also hours on facetime with my ex-roommate, Aida.
Ahh good times :)
But tears can't be stopped tho,
I am crying while writing this.
Because the core reason why
I do not want to even remember
that today is my birthday is because
my beloved ones are not here,
physically with me to celebrate
this special day of mine.
I sound so pathetic, right?
But truth is,
as you're getting older,
(yes, 21 years old is old enough)
you don't want gifts,
celebrations.
You just want to be in your loved ones' arms.
I miss my family, best friends and definitely, Qim.
Haha, I should stop crying but I just couldn't.
Maybe I should do what google asked me to do
when I googled,
how to celebrate your birthday alone :P
Or I should just,
sleep HAHA
Have a good day everyone.
And hello to the one-year older me :)
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